Stress and pressure are an integral part of sports competition. No athlete is exempt! It is believed that it is their responsibility to manage the high expectations of the coach, their parents and their teammates.
In fact, the pressure to “perform” sometimes comes on very early in a child’s life. One of the first performances expected of him as soon as he arrives in the world is that he sleeps through the night. Depending on the personality of each person, this can be achieved more or less quickly. More performances are expected.
Children are sometimes placed in an inner dilemma: to satisfy a personal need or to disappoint their significant others.
What to do as a parent?
In sports, as a parent, it is important to ask yourself the following question: “Did our child really choose this sport? “Did they do it to follow in their brother’s or sister’s footsteps, to satisfy a parent or because they really like it? »
If he does not choose the same sports activities as his brother or sister, he has the advantage of avoiding performance comparisons. This gives him the opportunity to be the best in his family in his sport. However, if he chooses the same activity, it is advisable for the parent to avoid this comparison at all times.
Children whose needs have been ignored or minimally addressed tend to have lower self-esteem. If children do not feel that they have “power” over their lives, they do not learn to trust themselves.
The merits, when there are any, are attributable to the people who made the major decisions for him. If the parent does a puzzle for their child, do you think they will be proud of their achievement?
If the child acts according to the parents’ expectations in order to please, he is already putting stress and pressure on himself, since he is going against his own needs. With time, and this is true for all those who want to please at all costs, he no longer knows what is good for him.
Review your values
Faced with this realization, parents must review their values. What do they really want from their child when they play this sport? The parent who focuses only on the outcome can cause a lot of stress for the child.
If after a game, he feels like he’s letting his parents down when his team loses or he didn’t participate in the scoring, he’s bound to dread the moment he sits in the car…
As a parent we must always ask ourselves two questions, are my actions always for the good of my child and is he happy and having fun.
The notion of having fun and enjoying yourself is by far the most important.
